I'd like to consider myself an encouraging friend, but I've been told I come across as quite pushy. Well, what can I say? I am what I am. It feels good to walk in your skin and just be you. Well into my forties, I've become not only lovingly pushy (smile), but quite expressive in my thoughts. What can I say? I'm just going with the flow of aging and peri-menopause.
I've recently had to use my pushy nature on a friend who has something I need - experience with teenagers. She's an excellent writer and I've been gently prodding her to begin sharing her experiences publicly to help encourage other mothers like me who have just entered the trying teen journey. She writes for our local paper, but that wasn't good enough for me. I wanted mothers across the nation to have access to this teen mom's experience and encouraging words; I guess this is when my encouragement turned into being pushy. Alright already! I admit; I'm pushy!
If I've said it once, I'll say it a thousand times...I need all the help I can get! I've never been a mother of a teenager, so where are my resources? My resources should be mothers of teens who have been there, done that, and are proudly wearing the t-shirt. This is just one part of motherhood I enjoy - openly sharing, lovingly bonding and gently encouraging one another - not being pushy (smile).
I love it when experienced and seasoned mothers enlighten and prepare me for what's ahead on this challenging motherhood journey. Whether you're a spiritual woman or not, sharing what you've been through or presently going through offers strength and power to another woman.
I spent more than a few hours with another mom yesterday and what began as a frustrated venting session turned out to be a very comical sigh of relief for both of us. We laughed and talked about our children, husbands, sex, money, jobs, the many uses of cucumbers, and whatever else came up. It was more than refreshing and our heavy issues were no longer so heavy. Did the issues disappear? No, but it sure feels good to know you're not alone in striving to be a loving wife and mother and getting very little in return.
So what about you? Do you have an encouraging word for another mother or are you seeking a few encouraging words for yourself? Well, my friend with the experience of teens, has finally began to publicly blog about her motherhood journey. Thank you, Lara! What's the big deal about blogging? Well, for me...it's encouragement!
Please drop by and offer a few encouraging words and welcome 60 Seconds of Motherhood to blogland.
If you enjoy writing and would like to share your motherhood experiences, please join mothers who blog and be an encouragement! The written word goes a loooog way!
2 Corinthians 7:13
By all this we are encouraged.
Look Into My Life...
As I share Life Lessons for LaVender, please don't judge me, but learn from me.
Monday, July 20
I'm Pushy!
Labels: encouragement, Monday Meditation, motherhood, teens
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15 Comments:
First and foremost, use the rod whenever possible. Teenagers will try us just to see how far they can go. I haven't had to whip either child in quite some time; but I'm not afraid to use it and they know I'm not afraid to use it. Teenagers are torn between voicing their opinion and wanting to be adult but can't get the childish ways out of their minds. It's a difficult road but I can say that it will either teach us patience or beat the crap out of them. Ok strike that last remark.
You pushed me to start my photography up again, so I for one welcome your pushiness! I need a swift kick every now and then to get moving on things I want to do, you know? :o)
I love your post today and yes I have been there. They must earn trust. Don't lavish them with goodies. Make them earn it. Teach them to handle money early and be able to budget. Check out my daughters blog - hers are not teens yet but she has a lot of ideas that are good for teens - such as managing time like you would money. homeschool-musings.blogspot.com
I guess I haven't met the pushy side of you yet, laVender. But I am curious about the many uses of cucumbers ;)
My mother spent last week w/us and I had to lovingly remind her..."I'm not you." I enjoy being just the RIGHT mom that I am to my teen! It's a challenge but I couldn't do it the way my mom did it. Not to say that wasn't any good at it.. or that she was anything like Joe Jackson.. But we all know how Michael 'nem turned out.. after that rod. At some point, we have to be the parents WE "ARE" meant to be to our own children. Every mom knows in her heart exactly what that is or is not for her.
With regards to the pushiness issue.. People will sometimes misjudge and not appreciate our strengths. So be understanding of them. Be forgiving of them. Most of all be yourself. Where one person may see pushiness, Everyone else will see passionate!
But. If anything of the pushiness issue has a ring of truth for/to YOU personally.. In my mind, that's the Holy Spirit teaching me (you/us) to study and perhaps make a change.
That's my lesson to mothers in blog-land today.
LOVE YA'LL!!
I think pushiness is good when it's done with a heart of love and concern. There's truly nothing new under the sun and I had the same hard head my 19 year old niece does, but she often says I was right about certain things...so that makes me feel good...lol.
Funny that you mentioned the perimenopausal influence. I laugh with my friends about how we've turned back into the "say what's on my mind, take it or leave it" women we were in our 20s.
I'm glad you had the opportunity to spend time with a friend to help you release a bit. It's a good feeling.
This post made me smile! I can be pushy at times too! I am not a mother, but I have two teenage brothers, and let me tell you, sometimes they are just not good! lol Hope you get some good encouragement and answers!
By the way I am doing a giveaway this week. A book on marriage. Come check it out if you want!http://singing-in-the-rain24.blogspot.com/2009/07/marriage-advice.html
Oh yay yay yay!!!! I am so signing up with her blog. I am drowning here, with an almost 15 year old, and my pre-tween, 10 1/2 year old Girly Girl! Can you spell HELP?! Okay, explain: many uses of cucumbers?!!! hahah!!!!
Okay, now I'm singing the song, "Ah, this is push-it!"
Pushy? If that is the word you choose to use, then okay. But I surely appreciate you and value our friendship - thank you for the push. I love ya, Buddy!
The blog is up and running. Y'all hang on, it's going to be a wild ride!!
As a side note, I will not be dining on cucumber salad at your house any time soon :)
Amen to connecting with other moms, whether spiritual or not, we all have something to offer to one another.
Ahem. God also works outside the church walls.
In May, I met a stranger who is now a new friend and I tell you it was an over-the-top connection.
Congratulations on being pushy [or nudging hard in the direction of encouraging others to be successful]. I am of the same thinking and never hesitate to share that this could be a great opportunity for me and/or others.
Be strong, and be confident...and use that God-given voice!
Yeah girl, get that experience so that you can pass on the wisdom when I need it!!!
Good of you to encourage her.
smooches,
Larie
I look forward for my next step in life and that is the motherhood, then I can relate everything here :) Since I been connected in Momsweb blog, i got many encouragement in life, thanks for sharing here momsweb. I enjoy reading your blog. i'm one of your avid readers.
Thank you for visiting my blog today!! I LOVE yours as well! I am a mother of a teen and can use any tips available. :)
LOL @ you being pushy.
Well I cant relate to having teenagers because I haven't had children yet and I'm a teacher of 7/8 year olds.
What I can say is I remember my teen years like they were yesterday... afterall I'm only 24.
My mother always felt she needed to put me in my place and I guess that helped. She never let me forgt that I'm a child and most importantly her and with that comes guidelines!
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