My Apology To Firstborn

I cried buckets of sorrowful tears as I listened to one of Firstborn’s teachers speak of his performance in her class.

As a homeschooler, I have never cared or believed in the school grading system, but now that Firstborn is in public school, we must play the grade game. Yuck!

I have poured myself into Firstborn’s ninth grade year, had conferences with teachers, given him practice tests, and even pulled him off the basketball team because of grades. I became mentally exasperated with the fight against his lazy unacceptable performance. Why is he only doing the minimum to get by? Well, his teacher told me she didn’t see a lazy child and spoke of Firstborn’s initiative and his determination to go the extra mile to get his work completed and to get it right. Huh? Are we speaking of the same child?

Well, the tears came because I felt horrible about the expectations I placed on Firstborn in his first year of high school, which is also his first year of public school. Because he didn’t meet my high expectations within four months into his transition, I punished him. My parenting style is that of a strict sergeant, and this loving teacher put me in my place and reminded me of my priority as a mother. In so many words, she told me to give Firstborn the love, support, and time he needed in his transition and to back off a little.

I came home from the meeting and hugged Firstborn. I let him know parents sometimes make mistakes and I made a big one. I praised him for the good job he’s doing in school along with juggling every sport he plays.

I will continue to be an involved parent, but will remember my priority is to raise Firstborn and Secondborn in the admonition of the Lord. I lost focus, yet was reminded, once again, that when I put God first, ALL things will be taken care of – including my peace of mind in regards to grades which do not define our children - their character does.
Ephesians 4:2 (NIV)
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.

Bookmark and Share